The Dive Guru™ — Boycotting the New Year

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Yes, it’s true that most people make resolutions for the New Year. And, yes, I suppose, the Guru can grudgingly admit that it can do some good. Among the top 10 are to eat more health food, get more exercise, quit smoking, save money or volunteer more. (Notice a conspicuous lack of scuba diving on this list?!?) More importantly, a 2007 study from the University of Bristol found that 88 percent of those that set New Year resolutions fail.

Well. That’s encouraging.

Take it from the Guru – the best way to succeed in your New Year is to have anti-resolutions. And who believes anything from the University of Bristol anyway?

The Guru is boycotting the New Year.

Boycotting the New Year

Here’s why. What’s the point in everyone making all these promises that they can’t keep past the fifth of January? Bah. Meh. Pshaw. The Guru would even throw a bah humbug out there if it wasn’t so overused. The Guru doesn’t believe in resolutions because the Guru is practicing what the Guru “preaches” all year long. Here are a few examples of “resolutions” that people make:

  1. Dive more. Literally, that would be nearly impossible. How could the Guru be a Dive Guru without diving? I’d have to say from the warm, vibrant reefs to temperate kelp cathedrals, from stunning shipwrecks to the local quarry dive, the Guru has it covered. It really isn’t a question of making a resolution to dive more. It might just be a question of making a resolution to dive less – at least if you listen to Mrs. Dive Guru, that is.
  2. Travel more. Well, the Guru needs a new passport this year because the Guru is out of space. Not to brag, but even the Guru thinks that’s pretty cool. They should make those things with more pages.
  3. Be More Dive Social. Ok, maybe the Guru should make a resolution on this one. It’s what the Guru would call “challenging” (yes, including the quotes). Hey, you try living in a cave for a couple of years. The Guru has been on Facebook for years, but now with ScubaEarth I hardly have time to leave the house and keep my anti-resolutions.
  4. Service Gear. If you’re diving a lot, you simply can’t afford to make gear service a yearly resolution. Not only can this be a really bad idea (read: the opposite of safe), but imagine how bummed your dive buddies will be when you have to cancel a dive because your regulator rusted shut. Oh, and for those of you heading on dive trips, here’s a novel idea – get your gear serviced BEFORE the trip. Trust me, the dive deck isn’t the best place to disassemble the first stage of your regulator. Seriously. Trust me. That’s why it isn’t a resolution anymore.
  5. Cover my butt. Here’s another one that I really think people should take to heart. And, yes, it’s from experience. So, what are the chances you’ll get hurt in a dive accident? Low, right? But, did you know that some dive insurance covers you for incidents that occur a specific distance from home? That’s right, I didn’t say dive incidents. I said incidents. Plus, in most parts of the world, dive insurance is very affordable. So, why wait until you really, really, really need dive insurance? Seriously. Get it now.

Seriously, you can be involved with diving all year long so you really don’t have to make a resolution to do so. In fact, I’d say you don’t even have to be a crusty Dive Guru making anti-resolutions either. Just take advantage of the opportunities. If you’re in an area with inclement weather, you can find ways to dive there (ice diving) or take part in some off season training (like Emergency First Response or PADI Rescue Diver Knowledge Development). If you’re in an area that you can dive year-round, just go for it! Quarry, beach, shore, ocean, boat – it doesn’t matter. And, for those times when you simply need to dry out, you don’t have to skip your dive fix (the Guru gets chills just thinking about it), just go to ScubaEarth for your scuba snack.

Regardless of what you choose, why not head down to your local PADI Dive Center or Resort for fun, food and more diving? Well, I don’t know about the food, but I’d be pretty surprised if they didn’t have fun and diving on tap so stop on by.


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